Not enough time!

Between work, family, calling, eating (preparing, eating, cleaning up), exercising and Gospel study, there just doesn't seem to be enough time!  We've reorganized the primary in our ward and I've been much busier than I had been previously with the duties of my calling.  Combine that with my New Year's Resolution to lose body fat and build lean muscle on my physical body and I wish there were about four more hours in a day.

I have found myself walking the "razors' edge" in terms of my spiritual/Gospel study as I have been using my intellect to try to move beyond the intellect which I know is a paradox (some of you will understand what I mean).  I have therefore been trying to refocus on service and simplicity, which is partially why you don't see more posts here.  There is a time for study and intellect and a time for active service.  They should happen, in my opinion, simultaneously, but there are times when we fall further into one category or the other.  If we are doing neither then we are falling into the illusion and are walking in dangerous paths.

The primary thing I have been thinking of and studying once more is agency/will power/self-discipline.  The will power to love, to follow the Master, The Lord, The Christ.  The will to lose one's own will and accept the will of God.  

Also, with the death of my aunt, I have been striving to think of my own death which is stalking me just as yours is stalking you. Perhaps this sounds melodramatic, but it is not.  We shall all die soon and we should think about this often, it will make us live our lives the way they are intended to be lived.

Another thing I have been contemplating is the nature of suffering.  Spiritual traditions of the East identify these following five things as the primary reasons of suffering:

Not knowing the true nature of reality  Example: Eat drink and be merry, for tomorrow we die and who knows what's going to happen anyway.  OR All that is real is material and everything else if a figment of the imagination.

Holding onto that which is temporal or unreal.  Examples: I can't give up X because it brings me happiness.

Aversion or revulsion or fear of that which is insubstantial, temporal or unreal.  Example: Being afraid of losing one's job.  Afraid of what others think.

Identification with a false, constricted sense of self or ego.  Examples: I am so wonderful.  I am so terrible.

The fear of death (similar to #3).

I leave you with this, my friends:

Stop suffering in your own life.  Gaining experiential, spiritual knowledge is the way to do so.  Doing, not thinking.  The best way to do so is to serve others as the Savior demonstrated.  It won't happen over night and it is nearly impossible in this life to completely stop suffering, but most suffering can end if you want it to and have the will power to accept the fact that suffering and fear are things we allow ourselves to be put through when we give in to Satan and the illusions of the temporal world.

The more we stop suffering, the more we want to serve others to alleviate their suffering.  At this point we become closer to God.

I hope you are choosing to have a happy new year thus far and allowing the unending blessings from God to pour into your life.  I am trying!